Ads R Us Jan 2004
Alternative Investments contemplates brand management, snails and mango trees ...Find out more

Get to work Dec 2003
Alternative Investments thinks about selling his soul to capitalism ...Find out more

Riding the downturn Nov 2003
Alternative Investments contemplates a former existence...Find out more

Losing everything Oct 2003
Alternative Investments is at his lowest ebb but gains perspective..... find out more

Goodbye, Salamander September 2003
After his sojourn on the island of Salamander, Alternative Investments makes a terrifying discovery and is forced to plot his return to England..... find out more

Cool swede makes hot August 2003
Uh-oh, Captain Alternative Investments is under threat from a pernicious tax investigator. Fortunately, wily man-servant Farouk has a cunning plan..... find out more

Unhospitable July 2003
Alternative Investments faces a gruelling quandary: should he allow sickly Salamandans to use his vast private medical centre? ..... find out more

Anti-minimumism June 2003
Alternative Investments plans a grand new palace to celebrate the success of his latest advertising campaign. The locals want paying. Whatever next, bloody riff-raff ..... find out more

Nervous consumption May 2003
The coffers are emptying fast, so Alternative Investments decides to explore the dark, murky world of advertising ..... find out more

Darts and wax April 2003
Farouk seems to have transformed into a belligerent alcoholic warmonger. Unfortunate then that he's returning to an isle at peace, armed to the teeth...... find out more

Under attack December 2002
Due to a horrendous turn of events, Alternative Investments's manservant Farouk is forced to step into the breach to write this month's column. There's trouble in paradise... find out more